So the twins will be three next month. Three!! It seems like only last week they were bouncing burbling babies and now they are independent, almost fully fledged pre-schoolers. It breaks my heart and fills me with joy in equal measure.
I love the fact that now my little people can play without me in the room (leaving me time to write this) and the freedom this gives them and me.
However, as anyone with more than one child will tell you that the moment that you turn your back on your kids is when they fall off the kitchen stool, find your stash of chewing gum, start a scrap that involves gouging or, indeed all of the above. With twins this is true as they pretty much spend every waking (and sleeping) hour together and of course it is super important for them to assert their individuality.
Whenever I meet another multiple mum my first question is always “Do your twins get on well together?” I want my two to be pals, allies and cheer-leaders for each other, however, sometimes it feels like they are arch-enemies, rivals, with one always ready to turn traitor and “tell mummy”.
Yet amongst all this backbiting (not actual biting, thank God!) I have noticed some patterns in their behaviour. And really it boils down to removing myself from the situation. Here are some things my twins do when I am
ignoring them in the other room.
PLAY NICELY TOGETHER
I know I shouldn’t be astounded by this, the twins are very good at occupying themselves and often play separately. However I have recently noticed that when I am out of them room they will co-operate far more. The games they play together are usually quite boisterous, involving leaping, pulling all the cushions from the sofa and yelling. However, amongst the mess and hollering there is alot of encouragement and turn-taking.
Now I ask you what would make jumping off the sofa more fun? Well, naked diving of course. This can also apply to colouring in, doing a jigsaw or almost any task. Pant-free is best in our house.
COMFORT EACH OTHER
Naturally in all this play (with mummy not paying attention) there will be some tumbles. I love that my twins really care for each other and will constantly check the other is OK. If one cries (and the other wasn’t to blame) they will offer hugs and plasters. Too cute!
For all that they play well together my twins are not Topsy and Tim. There are often minor skirmishes and ocassionally major incidents. Usually mummy plays referee, but I think that the twins have a lifetime ahead of negotiation and compromise so they may aswell start now.
There is no doubt that the twins have alot of
reptitiou s fascinating things to say. It fills me with pride when they engage each other in conversation. An excerpt from the exchange in the playroom this morning:
“Do you want to play shop-ladies, Freddie?”
“I is shop-lady. You want some mo-matoes?”
“Yes, please.Two pounds please.”
“Noooo, the till is mine. Don’t touch.”
“Mummmmmmmmmyyyyyyyyy….” repeat until acknowledged.
Ah well I never said it would last.
by Kim x